Posted Oct 20, 2015 10:29pm

Hard to believe that I found out about the monster inside me a year ago. Well, technically the diagnosis date was October 24, but I knew something was up a couple weeks before. I remember going to my cousin Hilary’s wedding in New Jersey, and standing on the beach wondering if I would ever see the ocean again. I cried, Tim held me, and I sent the biggest prayer of my life out into those waters, figuring that the waves would take my prayer to all ends of the earth and God might hear it echo all around him.
And I have prayed the same prayer every day since then.
And here I am. I have indeed seen the ocean again (Atlantic AND Pacific!), and I have been blessed with a zillion other joyful moments.
We went to New Cumberland’s Halloween parade tonight. Last year, Xander and I went with our neighbors (Tim was working), and all I remember is being on the phone with my doctor the whole time. Freezing. Barely making it home because my red blood count was so low.
Well suck it, cancer. This year, the parade was great. Alexander loved it, Tim was able to come, too, and I bet I could have jogged home (yeah right. Haven’t run in more than a year).
PET scan from September: everything is pretty much stable and the problem spot in my liver was “significantly decreased”. Stable at this point means that there isn’t really any crazy activity showing up on the PET. The cancer numbers in my blood, however, are still elevated, so there is still some cancer in there somewhere (although those numbers have either dropped or stayed the same since the scan. And let’s be real, here; those numbers have decreased ASTRONOMICALLY from when I was first diagnosed last year).
I’m still taking the chemo pill, and will continue until something changes, because it is doing its job. I also have THE best medicine – Alexander! And, I just spent a weekend in the Boston area with some of my favorite people in the world, which was just what the doctor ordered.

“The October sun filled the world with mellow warmth…Everywhere she walked the color shouted and sang around her…any wonderful unexpected thing might be possible.” -Elizabeth George Speare

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