Happy birthday, my sweet boy!

Posted Jul 12, 2015 8:56pm

First thing’s first – I don’t remember who I told or talked to, but I can’t have the Quinoa Pancakes procedure (which, by the way, is actually called Y-90). Too much radiation would leak into my lungs. So, I met with another specialist and they are going to do a more “traditional radiation” (or I guess it is what I think of when people talk about radiation). You know, the kind that sends a radiation beam through your skin and body to the spot that is problematic. I have a planning scan tomorrow and will get little dot tattoos so they know exactly where to send the radiation. I asked for stars instead of dots, but they say insurance doesn’t cover that. Then, I will have one radiation treatment at the end of July. The doc said I shouldn’t have too many side-effects because the spot is small and it is only one spot. Also, I don’t have to give up Alexander for a few days because I won’t be radioactive (the Y-90 procedure would have made me as such). And the doctor said he doesn’t think this type of radiation is any less effective than the Y-90 business (which makes me wonder why they didn’t just do this in the first place?? Because it is less invasive and such??). So that’s that.

Now, more important things. Alexander turns one on Thursday. ONE. We had his party yesterday and it was wonderful. Can you even believe my boy has been with us for a whole year?? So, I have been sentimental and emotional, to put it lightly. It makes me reflect on this past year. I was thinking, how could one of the darkest years of my life also be the most joyful? How can I simultaneously want to forget about everything that has happened during the last 9 months, and yet I want to remember every moment? It’s emotionally tumultuous, really.

But I am so thankful for everything. For Alexander. For Tim and the rest of my family. For the fact that I am here to celebrate Alexander. And celebrate we did (and will continue to do!!).

Plus, we are going to Hawaii. Next week.

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