For this day, I have prayed.

I mean, I pray for every day.  The first thing I say each morning and the last thing I say at night is, “Thank you for this day.”

But I’m talking about a specific day.  Yesterday.

Alexander started preschool.  I pray ALL THE TIME that I get to see him graduate.  But I also wanted to send him off to school to begin with.  And I did.  (Well, actually, his babysitter Susana did, because I work on Wednesdays.  But I dropped off and picked up today, and I feel like that counts.)

I took the obligatory picture, and asked him questions, and make a little chalk board, and all those things.  It was early.  He was grumpy.  So this is the best I could get:

IMG_5190

When we got in the car, I asked if he wanted me to take a video.  He said yes, so I did before we pulled out of the driveway.  That was more successful, except for the fact that I burst into tears immediately after I stopped recording.  Then I’m trying to explain to Xander that I’m crying because I’m happy, not because I’m sad.  And how mommies do that sometimes.

I get it.  All moms feel this kind of emotion at some point.  But these little achievements are just. so. epic. for us.  For me.

I was laying on the floor stretching a few weeks ago.  Xander was napping, Tim was working, and the house was quiet.  I wasn’t thinking about anything in particular or festering or worrying or anything at that moment.  But I felt an incredibly overwhelming wash of calmness sweep over me, and a little voice inside my head or in my ear or in my heart said “Maria, don’t worry.  You are not going anywhere any time soon.”

So I won’t.  Because when things like that happen, I just have to believe it.  I’m still going to pray big, though.  To meet Alexander’s kindergarten teacher; to help him with his homework; to watch him play soccer or march in the band or run a race or sing in a musical or do whatever it is that he chooses to love. I’m going to pray to see that graduation, and when we get there, I will pray for more.

Because God listens.

9 thoughts on “For this day, I have prayed.

Add yours

  1. This entry makes me so happy! I believe you heard God talking to you. There is no other way to explain that. God will carry you through this!

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  2. Amen! God listens and He is good! You are a faithful servant full of love 🙂 He certainly did speak to you and it is so wonderful that you were quietly listening to Him. Maria – God has wonderful plans for you! That is a lot to smile about!!

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  3. I remember crying each time one of you went off to school the first time. What a feeling-your baby is growing up! Smiles and hugs from me, Maria, because God has something special he wants you to do. Lots of love.

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